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I have never enjoyed moving nor do I enjoy staying in the same place for too long. It’s quite the conundrum for me as my family and I are in the middle of a move and for the first time going through the process of selling a house. I would not recommend this process for those weak of heart. It’s eating away at my soul. I feel like our lives are put in a little glass box for anyone with a notion and 15 minutes free to come and pick apart everything that we are. Now I know I shouldn’t feel this way. I understand that its business but it’s not merely business for me. It’s my life and it’s very personal to me. And because of that it hurts.

For 5yrs I have put my heart, blood, and sweat making a house into a home.  And now we must leave it. I am forced to watch as inspectors come and say this is wrong or that is wrong and all the while the anxiety builds and builds. For some time now I haven’t been able to have a break or a time to balance out. It’s never ending. Sure there’s a closing date but only if something doesn’t go wrong. I’m not even counting the actual packing or moving of stuff into a storage container that doesn’t exist as a part of my meltdown. For example: The summer time started and we were hot. So I packed the cold clothes into boxes and sent them to the garage with all the other stuff. A week later it’s raining and it’s 65degrees in my house. I know the sun is coming out already but it’s those things that start to add up and little by little the accruing weight starts to get heavier and heavier. I didn’t know it would be like this. I might have assumed it would be a bit of a shock but it feels more like being struck by lightning, repeatedly.

I love my family very much and for them I would do anything. I would endure anything. I started reading a book, one that I would hope help my deal with this journey, “Lord of the Rings”. Sure my journey is not quite at the level of Frodo’s and his Fellowship but the lessons are parallel. Although things may seem Dark and without hope, if you stay true to yourself and your family your task and journey can and will be completed.

One does not merely walk into Mordor and sell a house.

No matter who says it or where I hear it, if I hear the phrase, “It’s Summer time”, I immediately think of DJ Jazzy Jeff and & The Fresh Prince. It’s one of those classic songs that brings me back to a time where every little thing in my life didn’t give me stress or a in the least a certain amount of uneasiness. The song came out in 1991 and I was turning nine at the time. So for 25 years that song has stuck to me and has made a permanent home in my brain where there’s not much room to begin with. I’m sure there’s a scientific explanation how the melody of something can bring up the emotions you were feeling at the same time of first hearing it or maybe I’m just a huge pre-2000 Will Smith fan.

Listening to music has always helped me whenever I needed it. I can’t carry a tune in a bucket with a magnet but I can always count on the beat of a song to breath life into my day. I watched my 6yr old put on headphones and listen to music the other day and wondered what his song would be. He still has plenty of time of course and he’s six but as the Summer time starts and he continues to grow I might not have as much time to wonder as I thought.

The saying, “One of Those Days” is something I’ve muttered a lot recently. However, this day may just take the cake. I’m not sure where that saying comes from, take’s the cake, but I imagine someone dressed like the Hamburglar stealing a crying babies first taste of sugary sweetness is where it originated from. The things I think of when I find myself hanging upside down.

As the cold grip of steel bites into my ankles and it’s evil twin does the same to my wrists I realize that it may not be day at all. It’s dark but that’s only because I’ve been blind folded. For all I know it could be very pleasant out. I’m sure it’s not. It mostly never is. It’s not for lack of trying, no, I try. I really do. But with great trying comes great capturing. Or abducting. Or murdering, although that has yet to be done successfully. So, all of my trying and where does it get me? I wake up to my hair dangling on the wrong end of up and what feels like blood getting ready to drip out of my eyes, ears, and nose.

I sniff unconsciously after imagining blood coming from my nose and get a scent of something very unpleasant. The smell snaps my head back like a Shoryuken from Ryu. I knew the smell. From the first time you smell it there’s not a day goes by that you don’t think of it. It stays with you forever. The smell of death will always haunt you.

Yep.  My name is Wes Andersen and it’s just one of those days.

About this time Santa Claus is putting the finishing touches on his route around the world, elves are shining up that beautiful red sleigh, and the reindeer’s coats are thick and ready for the frosty night ahead of them. Hopefully all of those kiddies who wrote to the Jolly Man have been good all year long and not just a month before, because we all know from experience that there’s no fooling the Bearded Wonder.

That unbridled enthusiasm for Christmas that children have had been lost on me for a long time. It wasn’t until I had a child of my own that the joy came back to me. I’ve always secretly hated opening gifts from people that don’t know me as well as they would like. It scares me. Luckily for me I met a woman who took the time to get to know me better than anyone else in the world and now gets me the perfect gift every time. And in turn we make Christmas a special day filled with awesome presents and quality family fun with our son.

I love giving gifts. I do. I do. I enjoy shopping: online and in person. It’s one of those signs that I’m getting old or that I am old and I’m having a hard time believing it. There are those who think “the Holidays” shouldn’t be about gifts and what not and they’re right but I want to give those that make my year an enjoyable one something to say thank you and I know you well enough to give you something other than an iTunes card. It’s a part of the process for me. I can only enjoy this month with the loved ones by my side and the wrapping paper flying all around.

The only tradition we really have is on Christmas Eve. We invite all of the family over to enjoy in making cookies for Santa, hot cocoa, a set of new pajamas, and watching “A Nightmare Before Christmas”. I look forward to this every year. It was my family’s first tradition and hopefully when my son is older and changing what he considers fun I hope this day is still something he enjoys. And I hope you and yours enjoy the things that bring your families together and enjoy the fun that the Holidays should bring.

Celebrate the conclusion of another year but look forward to the New Year.

B.McGee

This one test’s result changes your whole life. No, it’s not the Sat’s or the MCAT’s. This test requires you to study the bottom of a Big Gulp before taking it, instead of a mound of books so big a Hobbit could burrow a nice home in. Although the methods may not seem sophisticated, the results will change your life for the better–It’s always for the better.

A Lady peeing on a stick is anything but ladylike but it’s the fastest and easiest way to know that what their body has been telling them is confirmed; They’re going to have a baby.

I remember when my wife and I took the test. Although I wasn’t the one peeing on a stick I was there waiting, counting down the minutes–counting down the seconds. This test is merely a pass or fail system. Well, not fail, maybe more of an incomplete. In that moment your life as you have been accustom to is over and a life full of wonder, crazy, and love like you’ve never known begins.

My little brother and his wife have recently taken and passed this test. A flood of memories surfaced when I saw their smiling faces as they told everyone the good news. I can’t wait for those two to go through the steps of pregnancy and prepare for the bundle that will soon take over their lives. Because he/she will definitely take over the homestead from the moment he/she enters this world.

Now, everything is not all sunshine and roses and it takes strength and faith in each other to get through the sleepless nights, the early morning runs to the market, and the un-holy diaper changes. But if there were two people I knew that had the love and the support of their spouse it would be these two kids. I am excited to see their journey through babyhood and the life steps that come their way.

I used to say I would never be married and with that I never wanted to be a father. But I met that person who changed that selfish mindset and everything changed. I hope that one day everyone can feel like that and meet that person who can change their way of thinking and their way of life for the better.

Good luck.

B. McGee

I don’t know what it is or how it happened but if I turn the TV on the first channel I go to is the one with the big ol H on it. Whether it’s American Pickers, Counting Cars, or American Restoration it doesn’t matter because the people on those shows are fun and their jobs look more fun. I am in no way talented in away at restoring stuff or knowing how to make money buying and selling cars. But that’s not all the channel offers. Take Pawn Stars for instance. Regardless of the show being more and more scripted it still offers an unique look into the history of our Country and others. The show was sponsored by Subway when they were all losing weight but now that they are considerably less heavy they are now sponsored by Sonic. They went from a very healthy option of food to perhaps one of the worst places to eat in calorie terms. It’s weird. If it was any other show I would be more perturbed but the one thing that the people of the pawn shop will tell you is, Money talks.

There a couple new shows this year that have peaked my interest: Search for the Lost Giants and Curse of Oak Island. I realize Curse of Oak Island is in it’s sophomore year but it’s new to me. Who doesn’t want to spend time looking for buried treasure or for a real life Goliath? I want to. I live in California but when I watched Down East Dickering for the first time, I wanted to move to Maine and hang out with Tony, Codfish and Duke. Or at least talk like them. Every show I watch I learn something new. I learn more about things I wouldn’t normally care about. I find myself looking up something I’ve seen on one of the shows and learning as much as I can about it. Thank you, Al Gore for the internet.

So if you have nothing to do and your DVR is empty, perhaps flip to the History channel and have a good time learning something cool. I do and it’s super fun. Thanks for reading what seems like an incoherent ramble. Because it is.

B. McGee

The end is coming.

The Journey to Middle Earth started for most people with, The Fellowship of the Ring, in December of 2001. However, my journey began earlier than that albeit in the wrong order just like the movies. I read, The Lord of the Rings in my teenage years because that’s what typical teenagers do. The common misconception being that the Lord of the Rings was written as three separate books when we all have been slapped and sternly enlightened that it was in fact: One Book to rule them all.

I was an ignorant reader in those days. It took me some years down the road to get to the Hobbit and since then every year I will re-read both books in all of their glory. But this time I read them in the correct order and I will sing the songs that are meant to be sung and I will drink a good drink as I toast the start of the journey. Meg Ryan’s character in, You’ve Got Mail, read, Pride and Prejudice every year around Christmas. Tolkien’s epic, fantasy adventure is my Pride and Prejudice. Obscure reference? No, not if you know me. I love, You’ve Got mail. Anyway, I digress.

I will admit that I have only seen one of the six movies in the theater (yes, the sixth is not out yet but I doubt I will make it). I have a stark fear of theaters and the crowds that accompany them. The only movie I did see was, The Two Towers and it was after three weeks since the opening. Regardless, the excitement built through the months of previews and the re-watching of the other movies bring back many fond memories of my bachelor days sitting in my recliner on rainy afternoons and watching the Lord of the Rings in their entirety. Did I fall asleep sometimes? Yes. And that’s the point. I will never forget what these movies mean to me and the enjoyment I will get when I can share them with my son when he is at the age to truly appreciate them.

I  remember buying the DVD’s one at a time as they came out: choosing widescreen instead of the traditional full screen version. Then when the box sets came out I bought those and gave my other copies to those who hadn’t enjoyed the movies yet. Then when Blu-Ray came to being I bought the box set of those. Then shortly after that I sold that set and bought the Extended version blu-ray set. It’s a life long love for me.

Even though the movies will come to an end of being made they will never not be enjoyed in my household. And the books will have missing corners and worn edges. They will have tape holding the spine together and every turn of the page will draw me further in to the journey. Whether it’s Lord of the Rings or Pride and Prejudice I hope everyone has a book like that.

It’s never to early to start campaigning to save one of your favorite shows.

Constantine, first season has been reduced to 13 episodes instead of a full season. It doesn’t mean it’s on it’s slow decent into cancellationville but it also means that the show hasn’t found the audience that it is intended for.

John Constantine is a pain in the arse. He doesn’t hide it. In fact he goes out of his way to make sure that everyone knows it. But having seen what he’s seen and lived a life knowing that the borders between Hell and Earth are slowly crumbling there’s not much time for niceties.

Constantine comes from the DC Comics world and from the first show on you know it. The dark settings and the darker enemies cast the theme for the show. A demonologist and dabbler in the dark arts, Constantine can take on much of the underworld single handedly. But as the walls become weaker and weaker, the more help he needs keeping the enemy at bay.

As the show has progressed through the first half of it’s inaugural season I told myself to not get attached but I couldn’t help it. There’s so much potential and the options are nearly endless in what new demon could wreak havoc. I’ve felt this way about shows before but then they were taken away from me way too prematurely. For example: Firefly, Pushing Daisies, Arrested Development, Deadwood, Adventures of Brisco County Jr., Lie to Me, and many more.

I know these examples are all over the place and probably date me severely but I can’t go through it again. I fall in love with these shows and it takes me a while to get over them. I hope Constantine can escape the early exits of others that deserved a better life.

Good evening everyone,

After a long Hiatus I am back and ready to do what I love to do: Write about anything and everything. I hope you have all survived without a little sample of me every week. I hope everyone has had a great Fall and a good start to what looks like a very cold Winter.

I have put my book on sale in the Amazon Marketplace. Here is a link there if you want a fun read to curl up to on these cold nights: “Welcome to Heretic Valley”.

If you have a topic you would like to know my opinion on or news about my other writings let me know in the comment section or find me on twitter @HereticValley. I would love to hear from you.

Thank you for enjoying the things that I put on here and trust me there’s more to come. Have a great night.
B. McGee

For one day only you can get my book for free on Amazon here, “Welcome To Heretic Valley” Not everything on this day is a trick, treat yourself to something awesome and free. Thank you for everything.
Brian

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